Monday, January 11, 2010

A Gardener I am NOT.



So my mom sent me an amaryllis bulb for Christmas.
My initial reaction: "Oh crap.  I am going to kill it and crush my mom's hopes of her daughter ever becoming a master gardener like herself."  Sorry mom....just keepin' it real.

The truth: I am a horrible gardener.  In fact, I kill pretty much everything I plant.  I am one of three sisters and apparently I am the only one who did NOT inherit my mom's "green thumb."

The facts:
Number of times this plant was knocked off it's window sill where it has been living for the past month: at least 20
Number of times we found the plant being eaten by the dog: 10 times
Number of times we found the plant being eaten by the 10 month old: 5 times (don't worry, we stopped him before there was any threat of danger.)

CONCLUSION: A gardener I am not.  I thought I was for a second when I walked in and saw a beautiful bloom beginning to sprout on my mistreated and abused little amaryllis.  I thought....FINALLY!  I have grown something.  I have succeeded in NOT killing a plant just this once.  Perhaps I do have a chance at inheriting the green thumb!!!!

Then I googled amaryllis bulbs and this is the first thing I saw.... 

"Amaryllis-One of a Kind: Of all flowering bulbs, amaryllis are the easiest to bring to bloom."

My dreams were crushed.  Nope.  A Gardener I am not.  My mom just knew me too well.  The facts are: this is the only plant that I had a chance with since it is apparently indestructible....so that is the one she sent me.  Thanks MOM!  See my beautiful blooms???  Aren't you proud?!?!





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